Did You Think I Said Cancel That Sukhovei?

You must have misheard. What I actually said was "no thanks pal, I've had three already".

Here's how it goes:

Tuesday afternoon, experts warn that a deadly wind known as a sukhovei could hit Russian crops this week. Market shoots up.

Wednesday morning, other experts say, phew, there's some cold air forming over Siberia, the sukhovei calledoffi. Market eases back.

Wednesday afternoon, Sukhoveibackoni other different experts to that last lot we got in, they were rubbish, now tell us that Russia has already had three sukhovei's last month. Market shoots up again.

What's next?:

Thursday morning, Sukhovei: I'm Having A Baby By Every Member Of The England Squad (except the gay ones).

Thursday afternoon, Sukhovei: Baby False Alarm Sensation (they're all gay).

Friday morning, Sukhovei: My Waters Broke In The Middle Of Harvey Nicks.

Friday afternoon, Sukhovei: Mistake - That Wasn't My Waters.

I'm loving this, I can't wait for the morning, in fact I might stay up all night now....