Steeple Bumpstead News

Greetings from the cold and chilly north to the good people of Steeple Bumpstead, where Mrs Nogger#3 and I spent a very enjoyable weekend being wined & dined by the local farm discussion group. I can honestly say that I have never seen so many Essex girls with their clothes on all at the same time before.

Hopefully they weren't too shocked by what passes for humour in the Nogger household. I do recall skipping over one or two of my side-splittingly funny jokes at the last minute on account of suddenly considering them a tad too risque, especially the one about the lady with a flatulence problem trying to buy a fishing rod from a blind sales assistant.

This lot certainly dispelled the urban myth of farmers being a load of skinflint old moaning buggers. They even bought Mrs N#3 a huge bouquet of flowers, although I hope she doesn't start getting used to that malarkey.

And I thought that all farmers' wives were supposed to look like a Russian shot-putter chained to an Aga? Somebody has clearly been lying to me.

Free beer, free food, foxy women and a smattering of grain-related small talk, put my name down for next year boys, I'll even pay for myself!