07/10/10 -- Incoming text message this morning:

"Hello everyone - this is the no for my new iPhone 3G - please retain"

Ha, ha. I've got an iPhone 3G and I just wanted to let the world know. Except I forgot to tell you who I am.

So what use is that to anybody then? In the unlikely event that I want to get in touch with a muppet then I'll send you a text back. You muppet.

Talking of muppets, who decided to host the Commonwealth Games in India?

I hear this morning that an assortment of British and Australian swimmers/divers at the Games have gone down with "Delhi Belly". I thought I spotted one of our lot was white when she dove into the pool, yet strangely brown when she got out of it again. Cheers.