Nogger's Blog

11/11/10 -- Suddenly wheat growers have never been so popular. By the time Vireol get going I foresee a situation when selling wheat will be a bit like going to one of those huge car supermarket things you see next to the motorways.

"You've got 500 tonnes of wheat to sell sir? This is your lucky day, if you sign on the dotted line right now we'll throw in an MP3 player, a Goblin teasmade, two pounds of sausages and a pigs dick for the dog."

Either that or people will be advertising on telly to buy your unwanted wheat.

"Simply pop your unwanted wheat into the supplied jiffy bag and wait for the cheque in the post. Make sure your diamond ring doesn't get mixed in with it now, as we don't want any of that old rubbish."

Keep it quiet right, but I know a man, who knows a man who's uncle grows wheat. Fields full of the bloody stuff he's got. I might be able to get you, erm, an intro like - for a nominal fee of course guv. Five hundred sheets and a week in Marbella should cover it like. I'm sellin meself short at that as well. Come on, think of the kids.