28/02/11 -- Libya and the Middle East contagion have lost centre stage today on the shock news that BBC's Countryfile sex goddess Julia Bradbury is pregnant. It's a 'miracle' she says. It certainly is Julia because I had a vasectomy in 1993, and don't go giving me the "toilet seat" excuse because it just won't wash.

I'm going to have to dismantle my bedroom "shrine to Julia" now as well, it took me ages to make that. Well that's it baby, we're his-tor-y. I've never been so let down since I found out that Peter Purves had been tupping Valerie Singleton all those years I salivated into my sticky-backed plastic. I really wish I hadn't deleted all those begging text messages from Kylie now too. Bugger.