The Morning Vibe

16/01/12 -- America is closed for Martin Luther King Day so trade in Europe looks set to be thin. Friday's S&P's downgrades weigh on the euro with the pound hovering just under 1.21 against the single currency.

Brazil got some rain across the weekend but Argentina was dry, a bit like Mrs N#1. We went to Relate once you know. The counsellor asked her what was wrong in out relationship. She said "I'd just like him to tell me the truth, be honest with me. Tell me I look nice and that he still fancies me from time to time." I said "Make your bloody mind up will you!"

Talking of cold and dry places, crop prospects aren't looking too promising in Ukraine this year. The Ministry there place the 2012 grain harvest potential at only 44-46 MMT, compared to 56.4 MMT in 2011.

Spare a thought for the poor sods at Cargill, they've just reported an 88% slump in profits for their second quarter ended November 30. Just USD100 million was added to their bottom line, making that their worst quarter since 2001. I'll organise a whip round tout suite.

The Germans are coming! Robert Wiseman have sold their soul to the Devil for a reported GBP279.5 million. Have you tried that new drink they've brought out? Vodka mixed with yoghurt? I had about a dozen of them on Saturday night. Absolutely Mullered I was.