Nogger's Blog

They've lost pretty much everything else by the sound of it. Following on from yesterdays revelations of nearly 21,000 cows going missing, here is the full list of items lost and stolen from DEFRA in the last ten years:

• 20,979 cows

• 122 laptops

• 36 processors

• 23 PDAs

• 15 projectors

• 14 mobile phones

• 13 PCs

• 12 rolls of gaffer tape

• 6 monitors

• 5 digital cameras

• 4 printers

• 4 power adaptors

• 3 docking stations

• 3 PSION (digital organisers)

• 3 software packages

• 2 answering machines

• 2 sat navs

• 2 VCR machines

• 1 telephone

• 1 fax machine

• 1 Camcorder and accessories

• 1 set of laboratory equipment

• 1 toaster and electric fans

• 1 dictaphone

• 1 charger

• 1 set of field equipment

• 1 keyboard

• Various car parts from official DEFRA vehicle

• 1 42 inch plasma screen TV

• Desk top Microphones

• 1 Victorian desk

• 1 modem

• 1 Memory box

So if you see any cows with laptops sat behind a victorian desk watching a 42" plasma TV, give them a call on: 08459 33 55 77.