Students And Grain Dinners

Students with nothing better to do from the Academy of Fashion and Design in Saskatoon, Saskatchewan have created a selection of dresses covered in peas, lentils, chickpeas and beans as part of the Sygenta sponsored annual Crop Production Week.

What's the point of that, you lazy, workshy buggers? Go out and get yourself a proper job. There's nothing original about adorning your clothing with food, as anyone who's ever been to a grain dinner will testify to.

I recall going to the LACAM Dinner with Bridgey one year, this is perfectly true I hasten to add, when it was held at the Prince of Wales Hotel in Southport. I use the word "hotel" in it's loosest sense.

The POW camp as we called it had conscripted the usual motley crew of spotty student-types in to serve on, as they do at these things. Unfortunately the young girl serving Bridgey either had a severe case of Parkinson's or was slowly emerging from a drink/drug-fueled coma. I couldn't quite tell which.

Upon serving the soup, poor old Bridgey had it liberally spattered by said Neanderthal zombie all down the left lapel of his dinner jacket. Those that know Bridgey will be unsurprised to hear that he laughed it off with his considerable good nature.

Worse was to come however when the gravy arrived to go with the main course, with which Shakin' Stevens decided to approach poor Bridgey from the opposite side, not wishing to herself be smeared in Mulligatawny I assume. The fact that she'd already deposited the first course down Bridgey's left clearly unsettled her. So there's Bridgey with soup down one lapel and now gravy all down the other, just starting to wonder if this is some sort of set-up.

Not content with leaving it at that, for afters we had ice cream accompanied with a hot cherry sauce. She duly managed to complete her own individual Mrs Overall style hat-trick by dripping scaldingly hot cherry sauce right on Bridgey's bald patch resulting in a very nasty boil!

Still, Bridgey did win the speech sweep that year as I recall, so every cloud eh?